Episode 11 – The Ballad of Snake Beard
Posted on October 21, 2015
Inaba the wolf approaches the paladins carrying Telfor’s potions in her mouth. There are 6 potions: 2 health (red), 2 mana (blue) and 2 disease/poison (green). Inaba nudges the pack toward them, so they think she wants them to take it. They split the potions equally between themselves so they both have one of each type. Aati drinks his mana potion, they store the remaining potions in their packs, and then they tell Long Dong Silver to stay behind as they head down into the final chamber. Aati & Illum encounter the body of Telfor laying before a bearded devil with snakes coming from its chin. The devil asks who they are. Aati replies that they are paladins and it immediately attacks them. The devil gets a critical hit on Aati, knocking him unconscious, but Illum quickly revives him and proceeds to chug both his mana potion and his health potion right in its face. They seem to be winning until it raises Telfor from the dead and commands him to attack them. Telfor begins shooting them from behind as he fires arrows at their backs. They refuse to attack the body of their dead ally and focus their attacks on the devil, who begins trying to escape and teleports away from them. In their righteous fury, the two paladins prevent the devil’s retreat and kill it, causing Telfor’s body to drop to the floor as well. They cut off 9 snake heads from its beard and take 10 golden rings off of the snakes as well as the devil’s black satiny robes and the focus stone that it was using for its necromancy.
Episode 12 – Roll for Snake Charming
Posted on October 28, 2015
Aati & Illum bury the body of Telfor and perform an informal funeral for him outside of the druid crypt. Standing over his grave, they each take solemn oaths of Devotion, swearing to do whatever they could to avoid losing any more friends. Their amulets begin glowing in their pockets and they finally stop to examine them. The two amulets look like two halves of a heart and the pieces fit together. Illum convinces Aati that they look like a butt. The two decide to wear the butt medallions around their necks. Then, they return to the druid Dehalam, who cleanses their focus stone of the evil that the bearded devil had desecrated it with. Inaba the wolf chooses to stay with Dehalam and they bid farewell to Aati, Illum, & Long Dong Silver as our heroes head back to the village of Tarnstead to return their newly acquired focus stone to Bekela. Aati, Illum, & Long Dong Silver return the focus stone to Bekela so that she can send out the messages. Aati & Illum remember that the other temples of Moradin are all near the major cities of Khelukkhaz, Cacot, Waleah, and Elmoor, as well as the temple of Del’Tassi where Aati came from. Khelukkhaz is north of Tarnstead, by some mountains and is surrounded by ancient ruins. Cacot is east of Tarnstead by a river. Waleah is south by a castle. Elmoor is west of Tarnstead by a lake. Bekela informs them that it is traditional to send messages in the form of haikus. Aati & Illum write up haikus and send them out to warn the other monasteries about the Sons of the Scourge and decide that they should head to the nearby town of Elmoor (the closest temple of Moradin) next and prepare to head out.
Episode 13 – Yes And
Posted on November 5, 2015
Aati & Illum decide to stop in at the local brothel for a well-earned lunch. They arrive there and ask the madam about Long Dong Silver’s backstory, but don’t learn much aside from the fact that he was born there and apparently had a successful regular show that he starred in. They are fed some low-quality gruel, but are so impressed by it that they demand to meet the chef. A half-orc with a ridiculous underbite comes out and introduces himself as Carl, the Gruel Man. With a natural twenty dice roll, they manage to persuade Carl to come with them on their journey and be their personal chef. The group heads to a nearby store to see if they can buy some goods. They meet the shopkeep (the same halfling who said “Hello!” in a high-pitched voice to them at the brothel). He uses their loot from the bearded devil to craft them a magical teleport ring and two snake belts that give them +2 to dexterity and intelligence saving throws. He also draws them a map of the nearby areas. As they leave for the town of Elmoor, Aati shares his secret with them. During his meditations, he had seen a vision of a powerful extraplanar being that had split itself into two parts. One of the pieces went into Aati and he has been searching for the person who contains that other piece. When he had revealed this to the head brother of Del’tassi, Brother Chadwick had encouraged Aati to go out and to get into a “missionary position”, which he had taken literally and headed out to Tarnstead to join the Hammers of Moradin. Aati says that he immediately feels a strong connection to Carl and suspects that Carl may be his “soul brother”. Aati resolves to find a way to complete this bond between them. As they set up camp and prepare for dinner, they are approached by three horned men as the leader screams in infernal, “Where are they?”
Episode 14 – Monster’s Ball Z
Posted on November 12, 2015
The group is attacked by three devils (one blue devil and two gray devils) on the road who demand that they be given the amulets. Aati tries to speak to them in the Infernal language, which is apparently a language composed entirely of musical scatting, but the devils quickly give up trying to communicate and simply attack. Aati & Illum have a tough fight where they are nearly overpowered while Carl continues to cook his gruel, seemingly oblivious to the battle going on behind him. The blue-skinned leader of the devils charges up a powerful spell, but Aati & Illum’s amulets reflect the blast at him, stunning him. One of the gray devils transforms into a boar-like beast, but Illum manages to kill it before it can take any further actions and Aati manages to lamely kill the remaining devil. Aati & Illum tie the unconscious blue devil to a tree and feed him some gruel to wake him up, hoping to interrogate him to find out who sent the devil and what they are after.
Episode 15 – Skibbity Bo Bop!
Posted on November 18, 2015
Aati attempts to get information from the blue devil, but it doesn’t seem to be very cooperative. They threaten to have Long Dong Silver work him over and the devil confesses that he can’t say who sent him or why. He says that he will suffer a fate worse than death if he tells them anything about his purpose and that he is doing this against his will. He was told to get their amulets, though he doesn’t know anything about the amulets. They look through the devil’s possessions and take 200 gold and a mysterious gem from them. Aati & Illum feel bad about the idea of killing an opponent that is now defenseless, so they plan to leave him tied up and loosen the ropes as they leave so he can eventually escape when they’re long gone. Satisfied that they have gotten all the information that they can, Aati & Illum sit down and eat some gruel prepared by Carl the Gruel Man as they attempt to learn more about Carl’s past; however, there doesn’t seem to be much to Carl beyond his love of gruel and he confesses to never having eaten any non-grueld foods. Illum asks to learn some infernal phrases. Aati teaches him, “Skibbity bo bop!” which means “Please stop attacking me!” Once they have eaten, they suddenly discover that the devil has cut its ropes and escaped. The two realize that their campground is no longer safe, as the devil will likely return for revenge. They head off and discover a cabin nearby in the woods. They are let in by an old fisherman named Raina P. Laudenslager, who gives them shelter for the night. Illum tries to use the Detect Good and Evil spell to determine his intentions, but his detection is clouded by the evil emanating from the gem that they took from the devil. They decide it is safe to trust the old man and stay. There are two rooms available, so Carl the Gruleman and Long Dong Silver share one room. Aati & Illum take off their armor and share the other room for the night. Then, Aati is awoken to discover a knife at his throat. He breathes a sigh of relief when he realizes that it is actually Illum’s knife and Illum was just playing a prank on him. Then, the two realize there is a second knife is at Aati’s throat and look up in shock to see that it is being held by the blue devil who had escaped from their campsite earlier. The devil slashes the knife at the string holding Aati’s amulet as Illum screams out the only infernal phrase that he knows: “Skibbity bo bop!”
Episode 16 – A Rainbow With All of the Colors
Posted on November 26, 2015
Aati gets the amulet cut from around his neck and begins fighting the devil. He grabs the amulet off of the floor and tucks it in his loincloth as he. & Illum battle the devil, desperately trying to get their equipment while avoiding the devil’s attacks. Illum blocks the door with his knife as the devil uses an illusion to make itself look like a spiderbear and they are both frightened by it. They end up briefly backed in a corner where Illum is holding both of their hammers and Aati is holding both shields around him. As the fight goes on, they manage to break free of the illusion and are freed from their fear. After a tense fight, Aati gets an incredibly lucky throw of his kite shield, which catches the devil in the throat, completely decapitating it and sticking in the wall of the cabin. The devil’s head rests on top of the shield while purplish-blue blood sprays out of its neck on the bottom of the shield. Aati confirms that his blood is actually red because isn’t a devil. Andy decides that Illum’s blood actually looks like liquid gold. Carl the Gruel Man then comes in the room wearing a muumuu with Long Dong Silver at his side. Long Dong Silver and Carl the Gruel Man are alright, but Raina P. Laudenslager was murdered in his sleep by the devil before it came for them. Aati & Illum give Raina P. Laudenslager a funeral, burning his body on a proper funeral pyre. They use the remaining wood to unceremoniously burn the body of the devil. As the fire reaches the devil’s horns, it gives off a strange purple haze and our heroes find themselves beginning to hallucinate.
Episode 17 – Vision Quest
Posted on December 3, 2015
The group begins hallucinating from the smoke coming off the burning devil’s horns. Illum begins juggling imaginary blue lightning in his hands as Aati becomes convinced that he is standing too tall, so he decides to crawl around the cabin. They begin ransacking the house and find a bunch of cured, salted fish in a chest. They become convinced that water is alive and it is the water that makes fish move, so they start throwing the dead fish back in the nearby river. Long Dong Silver runs away and Illum begins to chase him. Aati sees a vision in the sky of a man with horns, a fish, a hooded figure, a whip, and a hand with long claws. Then he decides to get in the water and get the fish back. Illum has a vision of Sebastian the crab telling him to get in the water. Andy reveals that Illum’s last name is “Hanson.” They both struggle to swim in the water, trying to get their fish back before realizing that they can easily stand up in the river. Aati catches a live fish and thinks that he has resurrected one of the dead ones. He releases it and tells it to be free as Illum eats it. Joe rolls a critical miss on an erection check and Aati becomes self-conscious of being 1% erect for the first time. Aati attempts to poorly hide in the bushes until both paladins hear Long Dong Silver braying in a distressed manner in the distance. Aati casts heroism on himself as a mostly nude Illum grabs two live fish. The two paladins run toward Long Dong Silver, who seems to be surrounded by humanoid figures.
Episode 18 – A Big Juiced Up Baby
Posted on December 10, 2015
Aati & Illum see that Long Dong Silver is surrounded by guards at the city of Elmoor and they are pointing spears at him. Illum throws a fish at two of the guards as one approaches him with a spear drawn. Carl then uses his ladle to hurl some gruel at the guard. Aati hallucinates that the other guard has is actually a baby wearing adult armor and repeatedly talks to him like he’s a baby, infuriating the grown adult guardsman. The guard knocks Aati down with his spear as Aati believes that his face has literally melted off. Then, Aati gets the idea to pretend to be a dragon. He uses his thaumaturgy to make a dragon noise to scare the guard, but fails and makes dog noises by mistake. Carl throws more gruel at the third human guard and the gruel violently explodes. Then, Aati tries to get the guards to recognize that they aren’t a threat, saying that Long Dong Silver is a local celebrity, but due to his incoherent mumbling, he accidentally makes the guard think that he is a celebrity. The guard decides to let them all inside so they can sleep off the effects of whatever they are on. Aati hallucinates that the guard’s head has grown spider legs and crawled off of his body, but chooses to follow him along with Illum and the others.
Episode 19 – Hitting the Horny Bing Bong
Posted on December 17, 2015
The group is led through the city of Elmoor and sees that it is a large city with gigantic trees growing throughout and treehouses set up in the canopies and bases of the trees. There are stone buildings mixed in among the trees. While the elves live in the trees, humans and dwarves live in the traditional buildings. The group is taken to an underground jail cell and tries to go to sleep as Aati hallucinates spiders with baby heads crawling all over him. Illum repeatedly hears a voice telling him that he mustn’t forget, but he isn’t sure what he isn’t supposed to forget. They wake up the next morning with a vague recollection of how they got there. A jailer comes over and tells them that the door was unlocked and they can go now that they have sobered up. Illum asks if they have any food and the jailer says that they can take what they want from the pantry. Aati gets excited about this, because he says that his brothers from Del’Tassi were very fond of big events called “pantry raids”. It is unclear exactly what took place at the pantry raids, as Aati was never allowed to partake. The heroes grab some food and then prepare to head over to the temple of Elmoor.
Episode 20 – An Army or a Donkey Show
Posted on December 24, 2015
Aati, Illum, Carl the Gruel Man, and Long Dong Silver all head to the temple of Elmoor. On their way, they pass by an enormous building with engraved carvings in the wall that show elves around tables and in trees. They hear cheering coming from inside the building, but decide to investigate it later and they head to the temple. They put their amulets back around their necks in case anyone at the temple will recognize them and can give them information about the amulets. Aati rubs incense on his amulet to remove any offensive odor that might have come from storing his in his loincloth. Upon arrival, they find an elven scribe named E. L. Fudge, who agrees to lead them to the head brother in charge, Brother Vashenn. Upon arriving at his office, they find that he seems to be throwing a party in his office. He has a bunch of people being raucous and drinking. This is apparently a regular occurrence. Aati & Illum plead with him to send his troops out to defend the other temples, because they are sure that the Sons of the Scourge will attack again. Upon being told of the danger, Vashenn is dismissive and says that he can’t afford to send out any troops. Aati thinks quickly and challenges him to a drinking contest, saying that was how they settled things at his old monastery in Del’Tassi. Brother Vashenn is amused by the challenge, thinking there is no way that Aati can possibly win. He asks what Aati & Illum are wagering. They remember that Long Dong Silver is some kind of entertainer, so they offer to put on a show with him if they lose. Brother Vashenn accepts the bet and sets up a round of enormous steins for them to drink from as as Illum makes a small bet for a few gold with a random dwarf in the room. Aati struggles through his third drink, but manages to make it through. After a tough competition, Aati barely defeats Vashenn, who reluctantly agrees to send out the army. Aati & Illum ask him to send the troops to Cacot, as that is the least defended of the temples. Illum loses his drinking contest and pays up the gold that he owes. Now drunk, Aati stumbles into a dwarf who tells him to watch where he is going. The drunken Aati seems ready to fight him and the episode ends.
See the next 10 episode summaries: https://dndbags.com/episode-summaries/s1-episode-summaries/s1-ep-21-30-2/