S2 Episode 91 – Kiss Your Homies Goodnight
Posted on July 31, 2019
After a brief conversation, the players insult Pabarel Darkstone’s clout and he responds by snitching on Aati. Aati is quickly arrested and taken away to the dungeon. Aati’s freedom suddenly becomes dependent on them securing their petition and getting him pardoned. With this in mind, the player characters promise to continue hunting down Illum and they also arrange for Pabarel to marry Scoria Rubyheart, securing a vote from both Pabarel Darkstone and also from Rhomb Rubyheart. Rhomb gives the group her apology pony, Ponelope, as a “thank you” gift. This guarantees that Pabarel will have access to the Rubyheart militia, a force of 200 soldiers, and essentially secures the death of Galrana and the Elven rebellion.
The Assblasters promise Minette Marblevein that they will help clean up the waters around Cacot by changing Vaerog’s counterspell into “counterspill”. They also promise her that they will convince Elmoor’s paladins to bring fish from the River Vees in Elmoor and that they will ask the king to build a university in Cacot dedicated to helping people gain clout. L.A.Z.H.O.R. refers to it as the “Clout Ruler’s Temple”. Lady Marblevein is convinced that this would be a great aid to her city’s economy, since it would doubtlessly attract plenty of nobles to the city. She promises to vote for their petition.
The group then tells Borathazon that Gorp had killed his son and they promise that they will kill Gorp in exchange for Borathazon’s vote.
The Assblasters give Gorp their golden crown in exchange for his vote.
The group is then interrogated by the Inquisitor, Ganister Ironspine, who demands to see the plane where they had allegedly exiled Squander. Vaerog changes Leomund’s Tiny Hut to “Leomund’s Tiny Hot”, which transports the group inside Leomund’s fireplace behind its burning flames. Through the fire, they see a pantless Leomund romancing his broom and putting a dress on it. They manage to convince Commander Ironspine that this is a layer of Hell, that Leomund was some evil being known as “the keeper”, and that Squander must have been transformed into a broom. The group rushes out of the hut just as Leomund becomes aware of their presence.
With all of the votes secured and the Paladin Commander convinced that Squander had been successfully exiled, the group is led to King Goldenbeard’s room.